Paying Attention

I’ve always had “a sensitive body,” one of those good/bad things, like being way taller or way shorter than other people. My body sends me messages that are hard to ignore, like red blotches on my face and puffiness around my eyes when I eat something like Mexican peppers that most people consume without incident.  On the advantage side, my body often gives me signals like a warning that the person seated in front of me is not as they appear. I’m sure everyone has these signals but mine seem a bit hyper-tuned at times. And being a dancer, I probably pay closer attention to this than other people.

Often an image accompanies the body sensations. Like last night, I awoke in the middle of the night in quite a bit of physical discomfort in my abdomen and head. I saw my body as a piece of hand woven fabric, being stretched from both ends. The fabric was becoming transparent and frayed at the edges and holes were being created in its center. 

Through the years I’ve learned that I pick up “stuff” that seems to be in the air, and then try to connect with where it might be coming from.  In mentioned this to my husband this morning, I remembered that, according to one expert on the Mayan calendar, today is the end of the Mayan 5125 year cycle. Many other experts place this transition at December 21st.  I have no opinion on this controversy, and little knowledge of what it would mean, one way or the other.  I do know this to be a time of rapid change and upheaval around the globe.

I have been describing sensations of an overarching chaos that seems to be permeating everything, both inside and outside of me. I guess as a way to impose some order, while standing in the hallway talking to my husband, I reached up to straighten a small picture frame on the wall along side the staircase. This action unsettled the picture above it, and it dropped on my hand, slicing a shallow cut that required a bandage to stop the bleeding.

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