A hummingbird just fluttered by, reminding me, that besides all my relatives that have arrived or are about to arrive, or who are catching a nap on the patio alongside me here in Palm Springs, I have winged relatives too. I’m most likely gonna need some of that constant flutter medicine to keep my balance during this week of holiday celebrations and family reconnecting. How blessed we are to be able to get together, we members of this far-flung family. So, on this first day I begin with gratitude.
Remembering is a big part of feeling gratitude. My friend Christine holds a year-end retreat for herself with another friend. They go through the photos on their phones to remind themselves of what happened during the year and what they are grateful for. That which was difficult or challenging can now be viewed through a lens of gratitude that the grace and grit were available and provided–from God, or Goddess or their Higher Power, or through their network of “tend and befriend” friends.
Our first familial creative project has been one of remembering, drafting, and continually editing, through text and email, an obituary for kid-sister, Aunt Maureen, who died in her sleep after lying down for a nap barely one week ago. She will be missed yet present at our holiday table, as we share stories and photos of her with each other and through our technologies, with Maureen’s husband Roman. We wrap him round with infinite love and wisdom.
As the new year approaches, I remind myself to let go of what no longer serves. I remember the ritual Rich and I used to do on many New Years’ Eves when we had a vacation condo near Corpus Christi Texas. We’d write items we wished to let go of on strips of paper and ceremonially toss them into a small bonfire we’d make on the beach for that purpose. It was a short ceremony due to the frigid nature of the wind and weather that time of year, and the fact that fires are illegal on the beach. We had to extinguish the fire and remove all evidence before the police patrol discovered it and us.
As to goals and resolutions, I like to identify a goal or deep desire and then consult with the part of me that’s smarter than I am. For me that means getting the arts involved. By humming and singing in the shower, the tune or words may offer an answer to a perplexing question. Identifying something I wish to accomplish in the future, I allow one hand to move however it will, and continue its dance till it comes to a place of stillness. I then listen for any message from its wisdom. Another version is to take a crayon or other writing instrument and begin doodling on a piece of paper while listening to a favorite song. When the song ends, see what your creation has to say to you.
As the New Year approaches, I wish for you what I am wishing for myself and my own family– May we all have gratitude for life, for one another and for what life has given us, and the grace and grit to let go of what no longer serves. Farewell to 2023 and a joyous welcome to 2024!
